One of the best K-Pop songs that I’ve listened to has to be Palette by Korea’s signature songstress IU, with a verse by the best crossover idol I’ve ever heard - G-Dragon of BIGBANG.
This song came out during an interesting time in my life, IU and G-Dragon’s life and a very interesting time in the world for sure.
It was April 2017. I was a senior in High School and 18 years old. I remember watching President Trump get inaugurated in art class, and I also remember this song coming out and being something I instantly loved because of how it made me feel.
You see, IU to South Koreans is a singer that people has been in the public conscience for a long, long time. She has a nickname in Korea: the nation’s “little sister,” and her discography is so massive, that her concerts can go for more than four hours long.
In Palette, she describes this sort of refinement of herself, where she begins to embrace signs that she is “maturing” into her then-age of 25.
이상하게도 요즘엔
(Strangely, these days)
그냥 쉬운 게 좋아
(I like things easy)
하긴 그래도 여전히
코린 음악은 좋더라
(But still, I like Corinne’s [Corinne Bailey Rae] music)
Hot pink보다
(Rather than hot pink)
진한 보라색을 더 좋아해
(I like a deep purple)
The verses all have this sentiment of “I am older now, I am mature, look at how mature I am, I like old people shit," type of statement.
But in reality, she is still a kid at heart and cannot let go of that - which is something that I resonate with very much.
Side note: these lyrics are in Korean, but I credit the internet and fan-made translations for helping me connect with this song on a deeper level.
I used to have this feeling inside of my head that said “Immaturity is underrated;” that the true self comes out when you let go of the weight that society puts on your shoulders.
We live in a time where the pressures of modern society like economic instability, political turmoil, cultural regression, the changing tide of social media and other factors and issues make the best of us grasp on to the last shades of our youthfulness like straws.
Embracing immaturity and our longing to smile is the best and easiest coping mechanism these days. When you think about it; as the world continues to gradually become more fucked up by the day, the more we yearn for "good old days" and not growing up.
I saw this meme very recently and it’s pretty reflective of our modern society:
Like IU, at the date of this piece publishing, I have officially turned 25.
When my dad was 25, he got married and had a kid.
Like the picture above, my priorities are slightly different; but for good reason.
Children are expensive to have; fur children are just as expensive and most of us are knee to neck-deep in some sort of debt that was accumulated to get us where we currently are.
In a perfect world - and we are really talking idealistic, mind you; where the stock market isn’t fucking fluctuating every single second of the day, where property values remain steady and unaffected by factors such as gentrification, where college is actually affordable, where health insurance isn’t tied to your job and “networks” didn’t fucking exist, where dating apps aren’t the only way to find a fickle sense of “love,” I could probably be at the same place.
Approximately two years prior to the release of Palette was a song that broke into pop charts by someone who appeared on Billboard for the first time: Stressed Out by Twenty One Pilots.
This comparison came up to me when I started writing, but I look at TOP’s record as kind of the “Anti-Palette,” in a sense - that these straws of immaturity, of innocence we have to hang onto them because its a sad, sad reality in the end.
Truthfully, that is the sole reason why I personally hate the song.
“Wake up you need to make money.”
What if I don’t want to wake up?
TOP’s song kind of tells that message, but instead of angst or anger at the idea - you know, the reason why I like Palette so much is because it’s a perfect backing track to saying “fuck you, pay me” at the world.
All of these things that are meant to confuse us, scare us, they don’t have to scare us. Without a doubt, you will be scared, but the exact state of being scared is only temporary.
As what G-Dragon said in his verse:
스물 위, 서른 아래
(Past twenty, not yet thirty)
‘고맘때’ Right there
(In between, right there)
애도 어른도 아닌 나이 때
(When I’m not a kid or an adult)
그저 ‘나’일 때
(When I’m just me)
가장 찬란하게 빛이 나
(I shine the brightest)
어둠이 드리워질 때도 겁내지 마
(So don’t get scared when darkness comes)
Clinging onto what makes the best of us is how the kids like me have to challenge adversity these days. I get it that other people - primarily older people, have had to “let go” in order to tackle these things head on.
I do not have to be them. I would rather fight it out and sacrifice with a smile on my face or weather out the storm in sadness.
I remember when I first gave myself the moniker “Pikachu, the Kid,” some people asked why as “an adult,” would I want to be referred to as “the Kid.” Initially, I explained that I wanted to have a nice, memorable name like Tyler, The Creator; but I stuck it on long enough to have a more nuanced meaning.
Though I may be at my age, I am still the youngest of siblings, and often times I found myself to be the youngest in the room amongst people meant to be my contemporaries. Recognizing myself as “the Kid,” was never meant to be a disadvantage to myself, but as a way to surprise others - that the impact of “the Kid” in the room can hit as hard or twice as hard as the “old head.”
We live in a young person’s world whose rules are written by old men, and where the gatekeepers are still so both figuratively and physically.
I, and we still have ourselves to prove. I am twenty-five, but there is still a long ways to go.
As IU said:
I like it I’m twenty five
날 미워하는 거 알아
(I know you hate me)
Ooh I got this I’m truly fine
이제 조금 알 것 같아 날
(I think I know a little bit about myself now)
Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays,
always and forever, ingat.